No Will To Go On
by Miss Kaizer If Ya Nasty
Summary: Tracey's tragic past is just to tough for him to handle so he decides to end it before it gets any worse


Hey This is my first posted fanfic so be gentle!   
  
No Will To Go On  
  
Dear Ash and Misty,  
By the time you read this I will be gone. You're probably wondering why I did it, why   
I committed suicide... Well, I've been depressed for awhile now and I guess I just couldn't handle   
it anymore. You wee, ten years ago when I was six years old, my parents were murdered. I'm still   
not sure who did it or why. It all happened in our own house. Late one night, I woke up to   
screaming, yelling and cursing. I had no clue what was going on and I was scared half to death,   
so I did what any kid my age would do... I hid under the bed until it all stopped. When I was   
sure it was safe, I crept out and went to my parents' room. I found them dead on the floor,   
surrounded by blood. I quickly dialled the police and they arrived in no time. After examining   
the place my parents' corpses were taken away to prepare for burial and further investigation.   
The only thing left of their's was my mother's headband, which I found on the ground.   
I slipped it into my pocket just as I was being taken away to my new foster family. I didn't  
even get the chance to go to my parents' funeral. At the beginning, my new foster family   
seemed great, but not for long. The father was an alcoholic and often came home drunk and   
took it all out on me. One night, when I was nine, he sliced my forehead open with a broken  
beer bottle, knocking my unconscious. When I finally awoke I ran away and never saw them   
again. I decided to change my identity by growing my hair out and getting a new style of   
clothes. To hide the scar, I wore my mother's headband, funny but it made things feel better   
knowing that I had a piece of her with me. I also changed my name, using my mother's fist   
name and my father's old nickname to form the name you two know me was now... Tracey   
Sketchit. So you see, my life had been full of awful experiences and I guess I just couldn't   
take it anymore. Ash, please take care of Marril, Venonat and Scyther for me. I know you'll   
do a great job and maybe they'll help you to become a Pokemon Master someday. Before   
I end this, I just want you to know that you both had nothing to do with my decision, if   
anything, you made it a harder one to make. Thanks for always being there for me, and I'm  
sorry this note is so long.  
  
Your friend from above,  
Tracey Sketchit  
  
"Well, I guess this is it," he thought to himself. He quickly folded the note up, took out his   
pokeballs and placed them next to Ash. "Good-bye," he whispered, a lone tear slipping down his   
face and landing on a pokeball. He quickly turned around and ran deep into the forest so that he   
could be alone for the last few minutes of his life.  
  
"Marril?" a small voice said, popping out of her pokeball. She looked around, not seeing her  
trainer anywhere in sight. "Marril Ma?" she questioned, as she picked up the note and glanced at it.   
Even though she couldn't read, she still had a felling of what it was about. "Marril, Marril!" she   
squeaked, shaking Ash viciously. "Pika?" Pikachu asked, popping up from behind Ash. Marril   
quickly explained what was going on so Pikachu thundershocked Ash awake. "Huh? What's going   
on?" Ash asked, jumping to his feet. "Marril," Marril said as she handed Ash the note. He quickly   
read it, a feeling of dread falling onto his face. "We gotta find him now before he makes the biggest   
mistake of his life!"  
  
The 16 year old stared down at the blade in his hand, knowing that it would soon end his life.  
He ran the blade down his wrist, watching as they turned a dark crimson colour. He pushed it a bit   
deeper, trying hard not to scream out. The pain grew stronger and stronger but he kept going. He   
had a mission to fulfill and he wasn't going to quit now.  
  
"I can't believe he's going to do this," Ash said as he followed Marril in the direction she   
knew Tracey left in. They emerged from the woods and into a clearing. Before them knelt the young   
sketcher, tears flowing down his face as blood rushed from his wrists, landing on the ground.  
  
"Stop that right now Tracey!" Ash yelled. Tracey dropped the blade into the puddle of blood.   
Marril latched onto his shoulder, Pikachu to his leg and Ash picked the blade up. "Ash, Marril,   
Pikachu. What are you doing here?" Tracey asked. "Stopping you from killing yourself, that's   
what!" Ash yelled. Tracey looked away from him, his dull black eyes making full contact with Marril.   
" Marril, Ma Ril Ril Marril!" she squeaked, her small tear-filled eyes baring into his. "Marril..."   
"Marril!" she queaked, as she hopped off his shoulder and opened two pokeballs, releasing Venonat   
and Scyther. "Veno Nat Veno!" he squeaked. "Scy Scy Scyther!" he said. "What did they say?"   
Ash asked. "Venonat asked me how could I liet him down. Scyther told me that he'll stay and help   
me through this like I helped him and Marril..." He choked out, trying to fight the tears. "She thinks   
this is her fault because she thinks she wasn't a good enough Pokemon for me." "And do you wanna   
know what I have to say?" Ash asked. Tracey looked at him a nodded. "Tracey, you're one of my   
best friends and I still need you to help guide and be there for me. I really care about you and I don't  
want to lose you now... and I think that your Pokemon agree with me," he confessed, tears running   
down his cheeks. The Pokemon all nodded in agreement.   
  
"So Tracey, what are you going to do?" Tracey looked into the eyes of everyone there and   
soon reached his decision. "I never really wanted to die, I just never knew how else to make the pain   
go away," he stammered. "It's ok, I'll help you through it." Ash told him as he wrapped him in a hug,   
the Pokemon joining in. "We'd better get these fixed up," Ash said, pointing to Tracey's blood   
covered wrists. He nodded. "Let's get you to the nearest Pokemon center and get these bandaged   
up," Ash said warmly. Tracey agreed and learnt that it would only get better from now on.  
  
The End  
  
  
  
Please Review and tell me what ya think! 


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